...afraid of commitment!?!
I just heard this by text message last night from a friend! I joke about it but I hadn't thought that it was actually true...
It seems that commitments are a problem for me lately! I'm now 30 and still single. I don't own a house, I have issues making concrete plans and I only date guys for 3 dates or less. So, I guess that I do have a problem with commitments.
This has not always been the case. I used to be the friend that you could count on to make the weekend plans on Monday morning. I loved to know what was going on in my life and the more concrete answers that I could get the better. But, somewhere along the last five years, I've been the friend that has been labeled "afraid of commitment"! As any good theory, this one is probably more complicated than I give it credit. I really believe that we develop behaviors based on past experiences, either consciously or uncounsciously. Deep down, I think that I've been convinced that no commitment has been long lasting enough. I haven't stayed in the same place for more than 3 years since college, with the exception for a few friends, they come and go depending on location and life situation, and none of my relationships have been long-lasting! All this has proved to me not to commit.
But, now I have some people in my life pushing for commitment, at least more than the "what are you doing this weekend" commitment. "I should buy a house", "I should date this boy", "I should make New Year's plans"...Seriously
Why did the "boy" disease of no commitment phobia hit me?!?
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
First Date Fashion - Why Do I Care?
The jitters have already started. I can feel them bubbling up and making me nervous about the weekend. What to wear on a first date?
I don't know why this has become a huge issue in my mind. It's not like I'm fashion backwards or anything. I should instead be thinking how I'm going to dazzle him with my personality, but in the far reaches of my mind, I realize that men are visual. In my twisted brain, that means that my fashion sense or lack of it will be majorly noticeable and a huge influence on the success of the date! This coming from the girl that once subscribed to a magazine dedicated to the art of shopping...
Once, my friend came over the day before a first date and we tried on probably 20 outfits, complete with 3 different hairstyles. We proceeded to take digital pictures, refine the outfits, take more digital pictures and then narrow down the selection! Funny thing, the date didn't go well, although he complimented my style (yes, I know, Laura, focus on the personality) and yes, I should have learned a lesson here. But, try telling my brain that.
Instead, I am compelled to get a new top and try on numerous jeans/pants/skirts combos in an attempt to choose the perfect outfit. Then, I'll curl the hair, straighten the hair, pull the hair back and finally just look awful because it looks over processed! Plus, I don't even know for sure what we'll be doing for the date. We have batted around a few plans; lights at the zoo, ice skating, dinner, Christmas shopping....so, how am I even supposed to plan, well, the skirt combos are at least out!
Any ideas out there about a good outfit that screams down to earth but classy? Oh, I know, my brand management background is screaming out.
Oh, and the guy? A seemingly sweet, seemingly active, seemingly confident, Christian man that seems to think that I'm great and gorgeous! Now, you know why I want to impress...
I don't know why this has become a huge issue in my mind. It's not like I'm fashion backwards or anything. I should instead be thinking how I'm going to dazzle him with my personality, but in the far reaches of my mind, I realize that men are visual. In my twisted brain, that means that my fashion sense or lack of it will be majorly noticeable and a huge influence on the success of the date! This coming from the girl that once subscribed to a magazine dedicated to the art of shopping...
Once, my friend came over the day before a first date and we tried on probably 20 outfits, complete with 3 different hairstyles. We proceeded to take digital pictures, refine the outfits, take more digital pictures and then narrow down the selection! Funny thing, the date didn't go well, although he complimented my style (yes, I know, Laura, focus on the personality) and yes, I should have learned a lesson here. But, try telling my brain that.
Instead, I am compelled to get a new top and try on numerous jeans/pants/skirts combos in an attempt to choose the perfect outfit. Then, I'll curl the hair, straighten the hair, pull the hair back and finally just look awful because it looks over processed! Plus, I don't even know for sure what we'll be doing for the date. We have batted around a few plans; lights at the zoo, ice skating, dinner, Christmas shopping....so, how am I even supposed to plan, well, the skirt combos are at least out!
Any ideas out there about a good outfit that screams down to earth but classy? Oh, I know, my brand management background is screaming out.
Oh, and the guy? A seemingly sweet, seemingly active, seemingly confident, Christian man that seems to think that I'm great and gorgeous! Now, you know why I want to impress...
Thursday, December 4, 2008
My (Weird) Doctor...
Moving 2 years ago really wrecked my health plans! I had a doctor in Indy that I loved and made sure to take really good care of me. But, after battling for 6 months to find a new doctor in Columbus that was admitting new patients, I finally stumbled onto Dr. B. He has to have the most quirky personality of any medical doctor. So, a recap of the first visit:
Dr. B: Are you married?
Me: No.
Dr. B: Are you planning on getting married?
Me: No immediate plans but hope to someday. Um, now, I'm getting curious! Why the questions unrelated to my health - IN THE MIDDLE OF THE EXAM, not the get to know you phase!
Dr. B: Do you have a boyfriend?
Me: Insert thought! Why is he asking! Yes, but what does this have to do with anything?
Dr. B: Well, I was just trying to see if you were planning on getting pregnant?
Me: Thought, so isn't the correct question, are you planning on getting pregnant?
After mentioning it to my then boyfriend as the weird occurrence at my new doctor, I promptly forgot about the conversation. But, fast forward 18 months later, I am now sick and a stay at the hospital that was a nightmare, when I never did get ahold of my dr. The office kept telling me that he would call and then I just went to the ER too tired and too sick to wait any longer.
When I got out and had the follow-up, I was now no longer livid, but angry enough to bring up the grievance of never getting a call back. Of course, he talked to me for something like 1/2 hour about my complaints and what could he do to make it better. Which at the end of the appt, he gave me another number, maybe his cell, maybe not, but supposedly the number to use if I couldn't get a call back! After the next appointment, he ordered blood tests and then called me that night at 9:30 and left a rambling message about the fact that they were fine and that he noticed that I had a birthday in a month, so happy birthday! That is along with the fact that he always tells me that he thinks that I'm a player if taking care of my health is the indication, WHAT!?!
Today, it wasn't so bad, but a little hilarious. I had joked with my friends that he's not hitting on me, but if he recommends that I start seeing another doctor, then I'll worry. So imagine my surprise and amusement when another doctor walked in...He was there as a study with Dr. B and I wasn't switching doctors, but momentarily, I thought...hmmm
Why do these things happen to me?
Dr. B: Are you married?
Me: No.
Dr. B: Are you planning on getting married?
Me: No immediate plans but hope to someday. Um, now, I'm getting curious! Why the questions unrelated to my health - IN THE MIDDLE OF THE EXAM, not the get to know you phase!
Dr. B: Do you have a boyfriend?
Me: Insert thought! Why is he asking! Yes, but what does this have to do with anything?
Dr. B: Well, I was just trying to see if you were planning on getting pregnant?
Me: Thought, so isn't the correct question, are you planning on getting pregnant?
After mentioning it to my then boyfriend as the weird occurrence at my new doctor, I promptly forgot about the conversation. But, fast forward 18 months later, I am now sick and a stay at the hospital that was a nightmare, when I never did get ahold of my dr. The office kept telling me that he would call and then I just went to the ER too tired and too sick to wait any longer.
When I got out and had the follow-up, I was now no longer livid, but angry enough to bring up the grievance of never getting a call back. Of course, he talked to me for something like 1/2 hour about my complaints and what could he do to make it better. Which at the end of the appt, he gave me another number, maybe his cell, maybe not, but supposedly the number to use if I couldn't get a call back! After the next appointment, he ordered blood tests and then called me that night at 9:30 and left a rambling message about the fact that they were fine and that he noticed that I had a birthday in a month, so happy birthday! That is along with the fact that he always tells me that he thinks that I'm a player if taking care of my health is the indication, WHAT!?!
Today, it wasn't so bad, but a little hilarious. I had joked with my friends that he's not hitting on me, but if he recommends that I start seeing another doctor, then I'll worry. So imagine my surprise and amusement when another doctor walked in...He was there as a study with Dr. B and I wasn't switching doctors, but momentarily, I thought...hmmm
Why do these things happen to me?
Monday, December 1, 2008
Ugh, Braces Again!
They're back...
I just had the braces put on my teeth. They feel way too big to fit in my mouth and I can't quite close my lips over them! I don't even remember what they felt like in junior high.
So far, so good. It hasn't been painful other than to bite down on some bread crust. With my high tolerance for pain, I'm hoping that is all the more sore that they get.
Why, oh, why did I have to be so vain! But, what is done is done. Just two years (and less for good behavior) of this torture!
I just had the braces put on my teeth. They feel way too big to fit in my mouth and I can't quite close my lips over them! I don't even remember what they felt like in junior high.
So far, so good. It hasn't been painful other than to bite down on some bread crust. With my high tolerance for pain, I'm hoping that is all the more sore that they get.
Why, oh, why did I have to be so vain! But, what is done is done. Just two years (and less for good behavior) of this torture!
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